Not all ambiguous grief is born out of intention. In some cases like adultery and addiction, one person makes an initial choice in behavior, and that choice can and often does, impact and hurt their loved ones. In other situations, ambiguous grief is born without choice.
No one chooses to be rejected, have dementia, Alzheimer’s, or mental illness. The onset of the aforementioned forces a space where loved ones must cope, adapt and adjust. Whether ambiguous grief is born through the painful decisions made by a loved one, or a life-changing medical circumstance, healing is necessary. The new normal can be incredibly difficult and those in this space are left to cope, often alone.
Whatever non destructive activity that soothes your soul, helps you heal, and steadies yourself: do that.
Get quiet, remember what soothed you as a child. Give thought to what brings you peace as an adult. You are your heart’s own alchemist and the remedy for healing is yours to create.
God, prayer, meditation, art, nature, exercise, friendship, community, baking, cooking, dance, creating, writing, laughing, crying.
Do what works for you.
And if you were hurt by the chosen actions of others, remember that a person who hurts you doesn’t get to tell you how to heal.